The Reason Why Rebercca လက် was born in Russia

boma pak

Rebercca လက် was born and raised in Saint Petersburg in Russia.

He was a rhythmic gymnast. He lost his both hands and arms during the career. After the career, He finished the perfumery course The Most Innocent (Το πιο αθώο) at the School of Perfumery Athens (Σχολείο Αρωματοποιίας Αθηνών) in Greece. He lives and works in Tokyo, and often be a guard at the building of Sophie Etulips Xylang Co., in Seoul.

R.. is a perfume label founded by Rebercca Son.

R.. strives to push boundaries, creating exquisitely crafted fragrances that are both innovative and timeless. Five years after its creation, the label continues to use the finest raw materials to shape unique, personal journeys. It is grounded in the concept of the bodiless

— the false sacrifice.

ELUSIVE. FRAGILE. HEADY.

ylang-ylang Nosy-Bé, muguet, sandalwood, deep Atlantic water, cedrat, white cedarwood essential oil, oakmoss, fleurs de lys, fossilized amber. False is here for the instant, and for the eternal. Its name softens the association with a closed regular hexahedron of the chosen. Dew drops look as if they might quiver at the nearby buzzing of a bee; admired, yet not-being.

(2017)

The Reason Why Rebercca လက် was born in Russia

1막

1장

바야흐로 몇 년 전인지는 모르는, 에메랄드 빛 외벽의 겨울궁전. 유리 계단, 서쪽 날개 2층의 아라비안 홀. 창 밖으로 내부 정원이 보인다. 회색빛 커튼을 두른 장식, 벽 한 쪽에 홈을 판 작은 제단,  손님을 모시는 은빛 스툴이 반구를 그리며 나란히 놓여있다. …

레버카 손 :

이미 수북히 쌓인 눈 위로 눈바람이 조용히 날릴 때에, 예카테리나 2세 여왕이, 답답하다며, 정원으로 통하는 기다란 유리문을 활짝 열고 밖으로 나가려고 해요, 제가 가장 사랑하는 장면이죠. 그녀의 하인이 그녀를 말리지만, 결국 몇 겹을 두른 두꺼운 벨벳 드레스를 부축하며 둘은 걷다가 점점 시간을 거꾸로 도망치듯 달려가요. 정원의 끝에 도달한 장면은 나오지 않으니까요.

제가 두 팔을 잃은 건, 아르모리알 홀에서였죠, 이제 시간이 많이 지났네요. 에르미타쥬 박물관의 별관, 그러니까 지금은 겨울궁전의 동쪽 날개, 의전과 제례를 진행하던 곳에서, 이 년마다 열리는 프세로씨스키이 페스티발 «쿨트 흐루프코이 씰(으)»(The All-Russian Festival “Cult of Fragile Power”) 의 리듬체조 파트, 세 번째 라운드였고요. … 두 번째 동작을 할 때였어요, 잘 기억나진 않죠. 바닥 저 멀리에 떨어져 있는 제 손을 본 것 같긴 해요, 천장의 불빛이 대각선에서 여러겹으로 퍼지고, 웅성이고, 그리고 어떤 냄새가 났어요.

제가 왜 러시아에서 태어난 건지 아직 잘 모르겠습니다. 그 이유를 알 수는 없겠지만 … 왜, 인간은 태어날 때, 자궁 밖으로 밀려 나오는, 가장 큰 상실을 경험한다고 하잖아요. 인간들 불쌍하고 너무 아름다워서 미쳐버리겠어, 진짜.

손과 팔을 잃은 후에, 잠시 프랑스 남단의 한 섬에서 애인과 살았어요. 그때 저는 제 정신이 아니었죠, 미친 사람이었어요. 근사한 작은 성이었는데, 성은 조그만 동산에 걸터있고, 머지않은 곳에 바다로 떨어지는 절벽이 경관을 이루는 곳이었습니다. 여름이면 동산과 이어지는 정원에 패출리와 튜버로즈가 만발했어요. 아, 참고로 제가 이렇게 말을 다시 잘 하게 된 건 최근 일입니다.  여, 여전히 더듬긴 하지만. 아, 아무튼, 저는 매일 집사와 정원사에게 튜버로즈와 패출리로 성을 장식하라고 시켰어요. 제 애인은 저를 너무나 사랑해줬어요. 저는 먹고 마시기를 쉬지 않았고, 항상 취해있었어요. 제 두 팔로 음식을 잡거나, 발가락에서 두 팔로 옮기고 발가락으로 집은 걸 입 안에 넣으려다 보니 집안에 온갖 음식을 흘리고 다녔죠. 그가 무언가를 먹여주면 뱉어버렸습니다. 우리의 관계가 지속된 건 온전히 키스와 섹스 때문이었다고. 그것만이 온전한 즐거움이었으니까. 그러니까, 저는 그때 그 사랑이, 이해가 안 되거든요. 그가, 제가. 지금 그 성에는 아무도 살지 않아요. 벽이 녹슬고, 잡초와 이끼가 무성하게 덮혀있더라고요.

0000 PRRW

Patchouli & TuberRose From Rebercca Son in the West

By  Maatter  Olfactive & Atmosphere Seoul

왜 팔을 다시 붙일 수 없을까요? 왜 아직도 그게 안 되는 거야? 난 왜 러시아에서 태어난 거야? 왜 하필 그리스에서 조향공부를 한 건데? 지금은 서울에 살고 있고. 어째서 팔이 없음에도 내 손가락을 느낄 수 있는 거야? 느낌 대 물질. 둘을 딱 나눌 수 있다고 해보자고. 그럼 뭐 선택할 거예요? 말하자면, 몰락을 뺀 시간, 그런 거 나는 모른다고. 본 적은 있어. 좋았어. 편했고. 그건 흐르기를 인정받는 시간이지, 아 저건 흐른다, 라고 힘을 쥔 시간. … 제가 이제는 자조나 피해의식… 에서 벗어나서 이야기하는 거예요. 그러니까 내 마음을, 마음의 진짜 한 구석을 완전히 주고 싶은, 이미 속한, 그런 시간 있잖아요. 즐거움이나 편의, 호의도 아닌데. 좀 슬픔에 가까운 거. 스펙터클과 카타르시스의 차이랄까? 그러니까 이건 뭐가 더 깊고, 숨겨지거나, 보이지 않는데서 오는 그런 매혹이나, 진짜를 찾는 여정, 뭐 그런 것도 아니라고.

그냥 그 단면 자체야. 면인데, 표면인데, 그 이상 깊이가 있을 수 없는 것들이 있단말이야. 알겠지만 제가 박제에 관심이 많아요. 근데 진짜를 박제하면 너무 좀 그러니까, 가짜를 박제하거든요? 가짜를 박제하는 순간 어떤 느낌이 드냐면, 자유로운 느낌을 받아요. 해방된 느낌. 뭔지 알 것 같죠? 노력하지 않아도 되는 그런 거. 수수한 느낌.

제 팔의 단면처럼, 무언가를 더 할 것도, 할 수도 없는 채로ㅡ 있는 거. 욕심이 없는 거. 그 자체로 정화된 거. 그 비용. 그 진짜는… 비용이 교환된 거고. 뭘 대가로 한 거야. 가짜는, 비용이 거기서 멈춘 거라고. 그러니까, 대가가 없다고. 내 팔의 단면에 대가가 있어요? 그렇게 된 거잖아. 그냥 절단의 단면이 드러나는 일이란 말이에요. 절단된 상태로, 찢어진 채로, 몰락한 대로, 그게 바로 제가 러시아에서 태어나고 그리스에서 향을 공부한 이유인 거에요. … 일본에서는 일을 했고, 또 제 피부가 보이지 않도록 어두운데, 대단한 근육질에, 눈동자는 파란… 이유요.

기갠가? 내가 좋아하는 거. 사람이 좀 추워야 생기는 게 기개잖아. 기개가 진짜 쌔끈하게 로맨틱해. 근데 러시아 남자들이 꽃을 그렇게 많이 들고 다니더라고, 진짜 너무 놀라운 문화였어요.

제가 태어난 이유 중 하나를 꼽자면, 러시아 느낌? 그 느낌 때문인 거죠. 물론 러시아랑 중국이랑 느낌 너무 다르지. 그 차이는 나는 아직 모르겠고, 그러니까 역사적으로, … 앞으로도 알 수 없을 것 같긴 해. 러시아 느낌이 없었으면 나는 태어나지 않았지… 그 느낌을, 너무 그리고 싶고, 반응(respond)하고 싶고, 너무 너무 그리워하고 싶어. 

(2020-2021)

The Reason Why Rebercca လက် was born in Russia

Act 1Scene 1

At the Winter Palace with its emerald-colored façade, we do not know exactly how many years ago. A glass staircase, the Arabian Hall on the second floor of the west wing. The inner garden is visible through the window. Decorations draped with gray curtains, a small altar carved into one side of the wall, silver stools for receiving guests arranged in a semicircle. …

Rebercca Son :

When snow has already piled high and the wind quietly blows more snow over it, Catherine the Great says she feels suffocated and tries to open wide the long glass door leading to the garden and step outside, it is my favorite scene. Her servant tries to stop her, but in the end, holding up the layers of heavy velvet dress, they walk, then gradually run as if fleeing backward through time. The part where they reach the end of the garden never appears.

I lost my arms in the Armorial Hall, it has been a long time now. It was the rhythmic gymnastics part of the biennial Всероссийский фестиваль «Культ хрупкой силы» (All-Russian Festival “Cult of Fragile Power”) held in what is now the east wing of the Winter Palace, then a ceremonial and ritual space belonging to the Hermitage Museum’s auxiliary complex, the third round. … It happened during the second movement, I do not remember it well, … I think I saw my hands lying far away on the floor, ceiling lights spreading in multiple diagonal layers, murmuring voices, and a particular smell.

I still do not know why I was born in Russia. Perhaps I will never know the reason … They say that — when humans are born — being pushed out of the womb is their first and greatest loss. Humans are pitiful and so beautiful, it overwhelms me.

After losing my hands and arms, I lived for a while on an island in the south of France with a lover. At that time, I was not in my right mind, I was insane. It was a fine little castle, seated on a small hill, with a cliff not far away dropping straight into the sea. In summer, patchouli and tuberose were in full bloom in the garden connected to the hill. Ah, by the way, it is only recently that I became able to speak properly again. I still stutter sometimes. Ah, anyway, e, every day I ordered the butler and the gardener to decorate the castle with tuberose and patchouli. My lover loved me very much. I never stopped eating and drinking, and I was always drunk. Since I had no arms, I would pick food up with my toes, try to move it to where my arms used to be, then bring it back with my toes to my mouth, spilling food all over the house. When he tried to feed me something, I spat it out. The only reason our relationship continued was entirely because of kissing and sex. That was the only complete pleasure. I do not understand that love. Him, Me. Now no one lives in that castle. The walls are rusted, and weeds and moss cover everything thickly.

0000 PRRW

Patchouli & TuberRose From Rebercca Son in the West

By  Maatter  Olfactive & Atmosphere Seoul

Why can’t my arms not be reattached? Why is that still impossible? Why was I born in Russia? Why did I study perfumery in Greece? Now I live in Seoul. Why can I still feel my fingers even though I have no arms? Sensation versus Substance. Let us say we can divide them clearly. Then what would you choose? In other words, time without collapse — I do not know such time. I have seen it. It was good. Comfortable. It is time that is allowed to flow, time that claims power by saying: “Ah, that flows.”

I am speaking now without self-derision or victimhood. You know, that kind of time where one wants to give one’s heart entirely, to something already belonged to. It is not pleasure or convenience or favor. It is closer to sadness. The difference between spectacle and catharsis, perhaps? This is not about what is deeper, or what is hidden, or the fascination that comes from what is unseen, nor a journey to find what is real.

It is simply the cross-section itself. A plane, a surface — some things cannot have any depth beyond that. As you know, I am interested in taxidermy. But taxidermizing something real feels excessive, so I taxidermy fake things. When I preserve a fake, what I feel is a kind of freedom. A sense of release. You understand, right? Something that requires no effort. Plain.

Like the severed surface of my arms: a state where nothing more can be added or done — just existing. Without desire. Purified as it is. That cost. The real has a cost — a price that has been paid. What was exchanged for what. The fake stops at the point where cost does not continue. There is no price. Does the cross-section of my arms carry a price? That is simply what happened. The exposed cut surface. In a severed state, torn, collapsed as it is — and that is exactly why I was born in Russia and studied scent in Greece. … I worked in Japan, and I stay in dark places so that my skin is not visible, with a strong muscular body, blue irises — that is the reason.

Integrity, maybe? Something I like. People develop integrity only when they are a bit cold. Integrity becomes so damn romantic. And Russian men carry flowers so often, it was truly a surprising culture. If I had to pick one reason why I was born, a Russian feeling? It is because of that feeling. Of course Russia and China feel very different. I still can not say what the difference is, like historically or otherwise, ... and I probably never will. Without the Russian feeling I would not have been born…

I was born to want it so badly,

that feeling,

To respond to it, to long for it so, so much.

This script was read at a reading organized by Celine Matter, a program of the exhibition,

Personal Language

2025.11.28-12.3

Personal Language, Seoul

curated by Seojin Yim

Personal Language is conceived as a time and space for languages that have been co-created but not yet connected. The exhibition opens each day as the evening grows darker.

Yangachi’s Personal Language (2025), a 16mm film installation, and Céline Matter’s “Love Letters”(2025-ongoing) series explore the sense of seeing the present through the memories and times that may not be one’s own, as well as the possibilities of co-authoring. Two letters were published online, which led to a number of replies and conversations. From these exchanges, the exhibition presents one letter written by Seo Hyun Kim. It also includes another letter in which Matter imagines the time of her own beyond the sense of disconnection within the time formula of the “present” held between past and future. In her text Carrier (2021), Irena Haiduk, who leads the oral corporation Yugoexport, writes about myths, material realities and systems of knowledge, and what happens when we challenge them.

The reading, scheduled for December 2, features Polite Society, Oh Myo Kim, Rebercca လက် and Marrit Kim van der Staaij reading their texts about images, bodily and temporal senses, mood and atmospheres formed through different experiences of displacement, including migration, adoption, giving birth, and travel. Following their readings, visitors are invited to read or share their own sentences or words on site. We hope the personal languages not yet connected may meet here for the first time or with a friendly familiarity.